When old man winter has dropped temperatures into the mid twenties and mud puddles are frozen solid enough to drive a vehicle across them without breaking through, the thoughts of many turn to......, what else? The days of summer, of course.

Okay, okay. So some of us are only thinking of ways to keep our buns warm; there are a few, however, who believe thinking warm thoughts makes you warmer. It's kinda like the advice of "thinking happy thoughts makes you happy." While I believe such a theory is good, thinking of seventy degree weather during a twenty degree day doesn't warm my heart...., or my buns!

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If you are like me, you’ve learned that, quite often, you have to laugh just to keep from cryin’! Just take a look around and think for a moment. It’s been cold enough the last few days that the expense of heatin’ your home is gonna skyrocket. It’s also gonna make the price of oranges and other fruits so expensive only the chimps over at Chimp Haven will get to eat fruit, and that’s ‘cause somebody else is buyin’ it for ‘em.

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What is the foremost question on everyone's lips today? Is it about healthcare? Terrorists? Weather?  Of course not. It's "what did Santa bring you for Christmas?"

Now, I don't want to seem so wrapped up in possessions that you believe I've forgotten the real "reason for the season", but I am rather proud of one particular gift. However, please don't take this as diminishing the importance or value of other gifts received. This just happens to be one of those gifts that not everyone can give.

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Odds are, if I called you a pencil-necked, thick-skulled, hair-brained goofball, you would probably call me something worse. And things would only grow worse from there.  Of course, there's always the possibility that you might just cross my eyes with a strong right hook, too. Again, things would only grow worse from that point.

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